Permanence
Dear Self,
The other day, a friend and I talked about permanence - and how it is but an illusion in this life. Just when you think you've had it all figured out, life plays a cruel trick on you. In an instant, everything can be taken away... and you are left to find your way through a NEW NORMAL.
It happens with parents who lose a child. It happens everyday in the hospital - people being told of their terminal disease, being given some random statistic about their likelihood to survive in the next few years, months, or even weeks. It happens to hardworking employees who are suddenly laid off from their jobs, their sweat and loyalty thrown out the window for the sake of the company.
I used to believe that if you followed the straight and narrow path, you would be able to keep yourself away from these awful circumstances. Get good grades, and you will land a good job. Be honest and hardworking, you will be rewarded and praised. Love your neighbors, and you will be loved back. But, you know what, real life is far different... much more heartless.
It doesn't care how much work you've put in. It doesn't care how many birthdays you've missed or sleepless nights you've endured. It doesn't care if you're the president of a company or the lowly janitor by the parking lot. TRAGEDY CAN AND WILL COME FOR YOU. And, in most instances, it comes when you least expect it.
You can never really hold on to anything in this life. I guess the lesson really is more about LETTING GO. The ability to remain detached, even to things you hold dear, is something I must constantly train myself to do. I have lost job opportunities, friends, and family in the most unexpected ways - several of which have jolted me out of reality and have brought me to the brink of depression and desperation. But I survived.
Presently, I am in a fairly good place. All things considered, things are looking brighter; certainly, much brighter than my 2018. But I no longer let my guard down for I know that this solace won't last. When will I fall again? When will all of this be taken away? I constantly wonder about these things and I try to be ready. Can we ever prepare for these things? I do not know. But I will try.
Sincerely,
Lagundi
The other day, a friend and I talked about permanence - and how it is but an illusion in this life. Just when you think you've had it all figured out, life plays a cruel trick on you. In an instant, everything can be taken away... and you are left to find your way through a NEW NORMAL.
It happens with parents who lose a child. It happens everyday in the hospital - people being told of their terminal disease, being given some random statistic about their likelihood to survive in the next few years, months, or even weeks. It happens to hardworking employees who are suddenly laid off from their jobs, their sweat and loyalty thrown out the window for the sake of the company.
I used to believe that if you followed the straight and narrow path, you would be able to keep yourself away from these awful circumstances. Get good grades, and you will land a good job. Be honest and hardworking, you will be rewarded and praised. Love your neighbors, and you will be loved back. But, you know what, real life is far different... much more heartless.
It doesn't care how much work you've put in. It doesn't care how many birthdays you've missed or sleepless nights you've endured. It doesn't care if you're the president of a company or the lowly janitor by the parking lot. TRAGEDY CAN AND WILL COME FOR YOU. And, in most instances, it comes when you least expect it.
You can never really hold on to anything in this life. I guess the lesson really is more about LETTING GO. The ability to remain detached, even to things you hold dear, is something I must constantly train myself to do. I have lost job opportunities, friends, and family in the most unexpected ways - several of which have jolted me out of reality and have brought me to the brink of depression and desperation. But I survived.
Presently, I am in a fairly good place. All things considered, things are looking brighter; certainly, much brighter than my 2018. But I no longer let my guard down for I know that this solace won't last. When will I fall again? When will all of this be taken away? I constantly wonder about these things and I try to be ready. Can we ever prepare for these things? I do not know. But I will try.
Sincerely,
Lagundi
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