COVID-19

Dear Self,

Missing my dog today. 😢

It’s been a week. With all that has transpired so far, it feels like it’s been a year. And we are just beginning.

A lot of us in the medical field never thought that an outbreak like this would ever happen in our lifetimes. We only read of these things in our textbooks - who knew that we would actually be caught, right smack in the middle of one?

Each new day, I wake up with a mixed feeling of gratitude and despair. Grateful, that I am still alive; that I don’t have a fever; that I’m not coughing. But, at the same time, I feel the dread of having to go to work in the hospital and risk exposing myself to the virus with every breath I take. Many healthcare workers have already been infected - it is only a matter of time, I suppose. 

Perhaps, the hardest part of it all, is the isolation. I don’t go home to our house anymore because I risk infecting my dad, who is elderly and has a ton of co-morbid conditions. Each night, when we talk, I shed a little tear inside, because I can hear the worry in his voice. I worry about him worrying about me. I am worried about his health, fearful of the day when I might get a call that he has started coughing or that he has a fever and I won’t be there for him.

But the saddest thing about this is that it’s about to take a turn for the worse. Poorly-implemented precautions and struggling healthcare systems are a bad combination. We’re not China, South Korea, or Italy - we are a developing nation with far more limited resources. We cannot handle a huge outbreak. 

Maybe people will take this more seriously once someone they know - a mother, a brother, or a good friend - succumbs to the disease. Maybe they’ll realize that they should have paid more attention when their loved one who is intubated and dying can no longer be admitted because there are no more available beds. Maybe then, they will take social distancing more seriously. And maybe, just maybe, they’ll stop being selfish and start thinking about the greater good. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 #covid #socialdistancing

Yours truly,

Lagundi